Being the most authentic with people who knows you the least.
In the Korean drama Search WWW, this conversation appears between the main characters Im Soo-jung and Jang Ki-yong as they have their first drink together. (Episode 2 | 39:00)
[Im Soo-jung] “I have a friend who is crazy about backpacking, and when I asked her what she liked so much about it, she told me that she go there to tell her secrets… Because the people she meets while traveling are people she’ll never see again… Since they are anonymous to each other... she doesn’t have to look good to them. She said “My secrets, my shame, my mistakes, my weaknesses, my pain, I can honestly tell them everything. I can most honestly be myself with people who know the least about me.”
I think I know what she means.
Is this something you can relate to as well?
Everyone needs a friend who will listen to their story. Someone who will lend an ear to all of our thoughts, feelings, and worries, just as they are, whatever they may be.
For most people, it is not easy to share their true honest feelings and secrets to friends, co-workers, and family. But why?
It is because they know us. The closer someone is to you, the more they think they know about you. They can end up “evaluating” and “judging” us based on their preexisting notions whether consciously or unconsciously.
So today, we are going to talk about having conversations with strangers, that ironically can lead to more honest and authentic connections.
The illusion that a close friend will accept everything and anything.
Strangers don’t have “sunglasses”
Let’s talk to lots of different people without prejudice
1. The illusion that a close friend will accept everything and anything
“I thought you would understand because we’re family” or “I thought you would understand because you’re my best friend…”
Have you ever had this kind of thought or been in this kind of situation?
A recent study from the University of Chicago found that communicating with a stranger can be a better experience than a friend or spouse.
People generally tend to believe that communication with their entourage is better than with strangers. Those types of relationships, however, have the potential to be overestimated in communication. This is also known as the "prejudice of intimate communication".
2. Strangers don't have sunglasses
Have you ever had an experience talking to a stranger and thinking to yourself:
“Why am I telling my heart to someone I just met?”
Talking to a stranger can feel different from talking to a long-term partner, family, or friend. A stranger would try to see and understand you just as you are, without any “sunglasses”.
In fact, a study by University of British Columbia psychologist Elisabeth Dan and her colleagues found that small encounters with strangers in life can have a positive impact on one’s happiness.
3. Let’s talk to lots of different people without prejudice
Like we’ve continued to iterate, prejudice is a big keyword. Things like “appearances” may greatly influence preconceived notions like intimacy.
Tin Can is a space where you can meet new friends just by talking, regardless of your appearance or background. It doesn’t mean appearance and background are not important. Tin Can is the place you can find emotional connection and chemistry first!
These days, meeting and getting to know people outside has become more terrifying and difficult.
How about using your voice to communicate your feelings with others?
Who knows? You might be able to talk about things that are difficult for even close friends to talk about on Tin Can.
Find like-minded friends on Tin Can!
Like a string connects the two ends of a tin can telephone, Tin Can might connect your mind and heart with someone out there.
✨ Open Tin Can and the magic of connection awaits!✨
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